Three Things I Don't Miss (#44)
only one surprised me
Last week, I gave a talk at Athena on intuition and how connecting to our inner guidance can help us care for ourselves and be the most US possible. That’s all I want for you, to feel like you can be the most YOU as often and completely as possible.
open your heart to wisdom from soul
What would that feel like? Making space to hear your wise inner voice? What could you learn? What pressure would release? What baby steps could you take to crack open space to welcome in some of that wisdom?
Sometimes, we hear the inner voice and stuff it down, not wanting to face the music or receive the guidance. We’re certain our head, the logic (I’m not against logic but it’s not the only way to make choices), and the outside info is enough. What could this wise body, this bright and brave inner GPS know?
Okay it knows A LOT.
I present you with Three Things I don’t miss now that I listened to myself about them:
a: my morning chai latte
It made me sweat, it made me a little anxious/jittery. But I loved it. Until I met the matcha latte.
At least a month ago, I went to Ember Goods, a coffee shop near me, and got the most delicious iced matcha latte I’ve ever had. I loved it so so much that I couldn’t stop thinking about it, extremely tasty.
That matcha haunted me. The next week, I went to Stellar Juices and got the Matcha Paradise Smoothie and the love affair continued.
As my disenchantment with my homemade chai continued, I considered, what if I switched to matcha? We had a camping trip coming up and making a chai when we’re camping is more work than I wanted for the trip, so I figured it was a great time to change it up.
Now I know that some people will understand the bit of conflict that can come from such a change, I hear it all the time from my nutrition clients. I love my chai! What if I hate it on the trip? I question myself here, am I being dramatic? Maybe? But I think it will be relatable. I decided to go for it, it’s a week, could I really suffer that greatly? I could not.
I did not. The thing I did on autopilot each morning wasn’t working for me anymore, even though it was delicious and enjoyable, my body was leading me toward what would work better. What a gift! A small thing but you know what? Listening to the small things will help us listen to the big things our inner guide is trying to tell us.
Does matcha smack a little bit of blended grass? Sure, okay. But I love it and it feels good when I drink it.
2. being a jerk to myself about what I eat.
This is so exhausting to do, truly. When you get into the mindset of food being good or bad, right or wrong, next thing you know, you’re looking at yourself that way based on what you eat. And does it ever get old. But the habit is hard to break!
To turn things around and speak to ourselves with compassion instead is not a small thing to attempt, but I’m here to tell you that it can be done.
Releasing myself from judgment about what I eat and taking the meaning away from it was harder that quitting the chai but I don’t miss it one bit. Recovering from and moving beyond orthorexia is one of the most freeing things I’ve done.
If you’re a jerk to yourself about what you eat, I recommend starting with noticing that voice and getting curious about food neutrality and taking morality out of your relationship with food. Here’s a newsletter turned blog you can read about food neutrality. Poke around my updated website while you’re there!
d: living in the 4 P’s
What are the 4 P’s you ask? Love to tell ya.
As outlined by Brene Brown:
Pleasing
Proving
Perfecting
Performing
Dear Dr Brown tells us that these are things that keep us from being our most authentic selves. That leave us playing small, ignoring ourselves and our needs, concerned with what other people think about us to the point of blocking out the voice of our inner guidance.
These are things that I witness with my nutritional therapy clients a lot as we discuss the nervous system and how the stress response acts in the body, how it feels. These are things that can be deeply involved in our relationship to food and keep us from eating on purpose.
When you feel yourself getting stressed, you can ask yourself, “am I doing one of the 4 P’s?” Pause and gently see if you can feel into what’s going on with that response, where did it come from? Is it still useful?
Where could you start to slowly, in tiny increments, move out of that energy of proving, pleasing, performing, or perfecting?
I’ll leave you with some lightness:
A dear friend recently shared this recipe for lemon mousse in her newsletter. Extra delish with fresh raspberries! My advice? Don’t accidentally double the sugar as I did.
I read Homecoming by Kate Morton while we were camping at the beginning of the month. It’s got mystery, family, and beautiful storytelling.
Thanks for reading!